School Days, School Days

The night before 1st grade...

We swam, we saw cousins, we went to the fair, we got a new dog and Mommy didn't care. Our summer was full of friends, gardens and sun, tomorrow starts first grade we can't wait for the fun.

I get asked a lot, "Why do you homeschool?" "What about friends?" "Won't your kids turn out weird?!?!" Well, the short answer to the question of why do we homeschool? Simply put, we want to be involved in the best part of their days, and for us, in this season of life, the best parts of their days are not between 4pm and 7:30pm when they would be home and awake. Could this change? Absolutely. Could sending our children to traditional school be in our future? Sure. Of course. But for this year, we're learning at the kitchen table and beyond! For a more in-depth description of our desire and why's of homeschooling, check out the posts I wrote last year. 

Why Do We Homeschool?

What About Friends?

Won't Your Kids Be Weird?

 First day of school!

Weren't they just babies?!?!?

 Mekonen Jack

 Evie Rae

 She's feeling like big stuff this year! :) 

 Getting started and they're excited. 

Their workboxes!

 We started workboxes this year and I am so, SO excited about them. I don't know about any of you other homeschoolers, but all last year I kept hearing, "Mom, are we done with school? How many school things are we doing today?" VOILA! Problem solved! I came across this idea on another blogger's site and was sold. Each day, I put their work in the various bins. They start at the top and work their way through the boxes. When they finish a box they move the number to the right side of the box. Then they can glance at the box and see how many more things they need to do. The boxes with a red circle mean "work with Mom." So if they come to a box with a red circle and I can't help at that moment, they skip it and go on to the next until I can help them. It's only been one day, but with Mekonen's need to know what is happening every second of the day, I think it'll be a huge help! If you're interested, here's a quick video tutorial on where I got the idea. She does a great job explaining the process. 

Evie's "signature" is by far one of our favorite things and we have so loved seeing all her "E, E, O's" written all over papers and things in our house. It's so cute. As Jon wrote about this picture I texted him yesterday....

"So sad for the quickly approaching day when she will learn to write the letter correctly and boringly like the rest of us." ;( 
(After she wrote her name she said, "Annnnnddd, I'll add a "Y."  Well, ok then. haha).

Does It Get Any Easier?

I've gotten the question/statement several times since receiving the referral of our darling 2nd boy, "It must be a lot easier this time around, with kids and the busyness of life to distract you from the wait and the months of paperwork?" Well, that would seem logical...we have three kids, we homeschool, our baby of the clan is a bit high maintenance (haha), and most days it feels like we have everything under the sun going on. I too, thought maybe this time around would be different. Easier in a way. But, I was wrong. Boy, was I wrong. You know that saying, ignorance is bliss? Well, it is.

When we went through the adoption process the first time with Mekonen, there was SO much we didn't know or understand about adoption AND parenting. So much. Jon and I are well traveled...we've been to lots and lots of places outside the United States, most of them being in developing countries. We weren't blind to the struggles and difficulties of every day living that much of the world lives in. There are very few things that "shock" us. But your life changes...everything changes when you step foot into the doors of an orphanage and take hold of your son. Everything changes...

You see, this time around, I know what my son is likely experiencing. Now don't get me wrong, I believe he is being taken care of, and I believe that our agency is doing their best to see that his needs are being met. But no child should live without the love and stability of a family. With every passing day that our son lives outside of a family, I know the things that become more and more likely- attachment, coping mechanisms, anxiety, fear, self-survival skills, uncertainty, health and development. No Mama wants to miss out on her son growing up, and that realization first happens in the realm of his birth mom. Despite stereotypes, or life choices, or devastating circumstances, no birth mom wants to miss out on her child growing up. So it's first there. And then, it's here...in my heart. In our hearts. You see, back then, before Mekonen, we thought we "knew" what we were missing. We thought we knew what HE was missing. But we had no idea. Now...now, over 6 years later, we know exactly what those things are.

This time around, I know what he's missing. When you walk into an orphanage, not just to volunteer, or to spend some time with kids, but to pick up your child, you KNOW, in a different way, what your child is missing by being there. 6 years later, we know what he missed. And on top of that, I know what we are missing. I now have the experience of being a Mom, of having children, of being a family, and I know just how much of his life we are now missing- the ordinary parenting days, the difficult parenting days, and the parenting days filled with so much joy you could bust. I know the fun of experiencing "firsts" and the fun of birthday parties and family traditions.

My mind still cannot wrap itself around the fact that by the time our little guy comes home, we will have missed the first 3 years of his life. I believe part of my inability to wrap my head around this is God's protection of my heart. I've been praying for it for months. Not that I won't necessarily feel the pain, because when we stop feeling, we lose part of our humanity, but I've been praying for God to protect my heart and my mind. To protect the heart and mind of my son, to protect our hearts from the pains of children and parents not being together. I believe God is doing this...but it's still hard.

So I wish I could say the second time around is easier. I wish it were true. But, it's not. There's a certain depth of heart that comes from walking difficult paths of life. We are far from "seasoned" but we feel steadier, more mature in our faith and in our love, and viewing adoption from that place is humbling and sobering.

So while we wait, we continue to pray for our son, for his birth family, for his heart, for his present days and his future. And we continue to pray for God to uphold all of us as we wait. Because, it doesn't get any easier...

Celebrating a missed milestone...our little boy turned 2 years old on July 9th. 

I Do, Part 2

July 4, 2015 marks 10 years of marriage for us.
It also marks the most gracious decade of our lives.
More things in life should be wildly celebrated...

And with incredible joy, we renewed our vows in the midst of those who love us most.

So here's a peek into an evening that will go down in history as one of the most memorable events of our lives. There are few things in life so profound as marriage & family. 

We should celebrate both more frequently. 

My parents were in town and kept the kids for the day so we, and a whole host of dear friends, could set up. We prayed non-stop that God would hold off the rain. Every hour that passed showed the next as pouring rain. But, NOT A DROP!!!! YEAH!!!! It would've been just fine if it rained. We would've moved everything inside, it just would've had a different feel than we were going for! 

How adorable is this! 

Praying together before the ceremony with Eric Bobbitt, a dear friend, mentor, and pastor. 

It was a small crowd, but she begged for weeks to "throw flowers" at our "wedding party" as she would say. Then when we all walked together, she got shy, and didn't throw one petal. ;)

 This sweet nugget was so giddy and happy waiting for everything to start.

 I tried so hard to get a clear pic of this...she kept running into my legs with the biggest hug and laughing wildly.

 Oh these three...the best.

We walked as a family to the song "The Table" by Chris Tomlin. It's one of our absolute favorites.

 Prayer led by our pastor, Brian.

Our pastor, Brian, spoke from God's Word and led off the ceremony. 

 Our friend Luke led everyone in singing three of our favorite hymns.

 Eric gave us each amazing charges, completely tailored to each of our personalities, strengths, and weaknesses. And then led us in renewing our vows. 

 

 After the vows, Jon said to Eric, "Can I kiss my wife now?" :) haha. 

At the end, everyone came around us and prayed a blessing over us. Such a special time for us. 

After that, the song "Better Together" by Jack Johnson (another favorite song of ours) played while everyone made their way to the tent for a fabulous dinner!

All designed and done by a dear, very talented, friend. Can you believe this? Now that's Pinterest worthy!!! :) 

 Sitting at two long family style tables was important to us and signified "the table of the Lord" that Chris Tomlin sang about in his song. Just a little taste of heaven...

Perfection. 

We long for others to experience the genuine love, encouragement and support of true, authentic and grace-filled community. It's a sweet reminder of the hope to come, when we all sit at the Lord’s table together, when all of creation and humanity are fully restored, and we enjoy the fullness of complete relationship with each other and Jesus. God in his goodness gives us glimpses here on earth of that fullness to come, and that was experienced this precious, July 3rd. 

It's taken over a week for me to even sit down and blog. We're still basking in the unending joy of this special evening. A resounding thought in my mind for the couple weeks leading up to this celebration was, "God loves me. He loves us. God is so incredibly kind." This thought happened over and over as little things fell in place for this evening, finding the perfect outfit, the most beautiful flowers, the ease with which every detail fell into place, how everything worked out better than we ever thought it would, and for the little details that made for one amazing event. 

Our hearts are full and exploding with gratefulness for the many key players in the life of our family. For the couple who walked hand in hand with us for years, who were the game changers for our family, and who, without them, this night wouldn't have been possible. We are overwhelmed with gratefulness for all the ways that God uses individual friends, in all their unique strengths and gifts to uphold what God upholds, and celebrate what God celebrates. To the friends who put endless time and energy into making this evening one of the most beautiful of our lives. I'm pretty sure we are some of the most loved people on the face of the earth. :) 

And a special thanks for not only the friendship of Adam & Allie but for their gift of capturing this evening in such beautiful pictures. 

We are loved. So very loved.