5.14.2009

A Few Thoughts...

We received two of the cutest pictures of Mekonen this past week from a traveling family! He actually doesn't look scared or confused in these ones, which helps my mommy heart! He's kind of smiling in one of them and has a little dimple! Yes, a dimple! I hope that sticks around! Oh I want to kiss that little brown face! He is simply beautiful!!!

I have wanted Mekonen home in a different way this week. I can't describe it, but it's a new stage of longing, a new feeling of wanting desperately to have him here. Jesus has been so close to me this week...I feel so at peace despite this new, different, desperate need for my son. I am confident in his plan for seeing our son arrive home and I continue, steady on, trusting that there will be an end to the wait.... soon.

My sister Amy has been my biggest support throughout this adoption process (besides my Jonny of course). She understands the process completely. She is a mom to a son born in Guatemala and a biological daughter. She's done both and has felt it all. She sent me an encouraging message awhile back and it was so insightful. It really speaks to how I am feeling this week.
Adoption is totally different than pregnancy because you feel for this baby who is already here, that you cannot hold or comfort. The strain when your child is already there somewhere, is so different. It's a mom thing that is anxiety and trust in a way like you've never experienced. I am so thankful for that time of waiting because I feel like I understood far earlier that God is 'loaning' my kids to me from him and that he is in control, not me.
What a great thought! I never thought of this waiting as depicting that very truth. God is loaning our children to us asking us to love them and raise them to know Jesus and go out and make a difference in our world.

2 comments:

Sarah Dawn said...

Delighted to be walking on this journey with you as well. As we begin the waiting process, your words bring encouragement and His hope.

Blessings from Costa Rica,
Sarah Dawn

Shonah said...

That is a really wonderful thing your sister said! I am right there with you in this time of waiting. The easy part was waiting for the referral, at least I see that now. Watching your child grow up two thousand miles away can be a lot to manage, I will be praying for you. It is amazing what God can to for us and within us in our times of waiting, hang in there!